Saturday, September 22, 2012


One day old Andrew. Paul Khor came and took these photos for us. I was heart broken knowing there were the last photos we were going to have. No expensive flowers for Andrew. Just garden weeds, the dandelion.

What is reality?
Twenty three years  and 6 days to this day,
I had been sick for a fortnight
My cold, persistent coughing and weak bladder kept me awake.

Twenty three years and 5 days to this day,
I went to my doctor
He admitted me to the hospital.
I had a battery of tests.
I went to the antenatal ward,
I made friends with mothers who have problem pregnancies.

Twenty three years and 4 days on this day,
They sent me home without any treatment.

Twenty three years to this day,
Andrew was born 3 weeks early.
They tell me he was going to die tonight.

Twenty three years less 55 days to this day,
Andrew died.

What is reality?
Reality is he is gone.
Reality is crying into your pillow.
Reality is empty arms.
Reality is many things are frivolous.
On the plus side,
Reality is I have empathy,
I care for the less fortunate.
Reality is there are many like me.
I cry for those bereaved mothers.
My heart bleed for those who are not allow to grief.

REALITY after losing a child…

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